Is 41 years long enough to date before getting married? Maybe you heard about the couple who dated 41 years before getting married. More couples are engaging in extended dating, but there’s a point of diminishing return. Our research found that stepcouples who dated five years or longer had lower quality relationships. Tension develops. Often because one partner wants to get married more than the other. Add in issues of sexual purity, finances, kids and things can turn sour. My advice? Either make a commitment or don’t. Don’t drag it out.